Fashion week is hectic, competitive and stressful, and like all things hectic, competitive and stressful, it brings out the worst in people. I’ve been on both sides of the fence, as designer and as a writer covering designers and I understand the pressures associated with both responsibilities. I’m not saying that I’m immune to them and I’ve definitely had my moments. But, I have noticed and taken steps to be a better person, and in the end, the people around you are happier, and you end up happier. So, take a deep breath, think “serenity now” and stop being a menace to society.

First things first, there are nice ways and mean ways to say things. Both require the same effort. Be nice.

Second, if you have so much to do that you feel overwhelmed, make a list and cross things off as you do them. I know it sounds elementary but you’d be surprised how few people actually use a list to keep track of the many things they need to do.

Third, your time is not worth more than those around you. If you’re meeting with someone, focus on the task at hand, and when you’re done, cross it off of your handy list. I’ve had meetings with people where they stop to call other people on unrelated matters, check email and they end up wasting my time. That’s inconsiderate and rude. If you have a list, and stick to it, you won’t waste your time, and the time of the people you’re meeting with.

Fourth, if you hear bad news or info that’s a bit stressful, take a deep breath before you do anything. Sometimes when you just react without thinking, you don’t take the action that’s best for you and the situation. Always think things through and make sure that there’s a reason (other than ego) for doing things.

Fifth, sometimes people say and do things that are just plain mean and/or stupid. Instead of following your initial instinct of maybe doing something or saying something a bit unladylike, determine whether the action or statement is even worthy of a response. Sometimes, stupid statements and actions don’t warrant a reaction and I try to keep the higher ground by letting things just roll off of me.

My last point is in regard to your “competition.” In the Art of War, Sun Tzu said something to the effect of “Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer.” Don’t shy away from the competition or get into the sneaky, manipulative head games they play. They need info? Give it to them. Be confident that you are better and that what you do with the same info will far exceed what they can do. It’s annoying with people constantly on your tail but the trick is to stay ahead of the pack. The fashion industry doesn’t have to live up to the stereotype of being shallow and bitchy. You are in full control of how you present yourself.

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